Ozymandias

Excerpt From Ozymandias’ Diary – I

It was only at the last moment that I realised that I would die either way. Probability is a funny thing. If you know the outcome and it’s bad, you will almost always regret the choice you made and it would seem obvious that the other choice was better.

For me too, probability played its game. Unfortunately, in my case, both the outcomes were the same.

Anyways, goodbye guys! It was nice talking to you.

Oh! I’m sorry. I forgot to give you the context.

My name is Ozymandias and I am a professional dier. And no, I am not interested in dyeing your clothes or hair. But if you are about to die and you don’t want to die just yet, I will take your place instead in the sweet embrace of death. You will get a full lifetime – which would be equivalent of what you have lived till now.

There is of course, a catch. Basically, you would start ageing backwards. For example, if you were to die at 50 and I took your place, you would start going back to 0. The reason, as per Death is that no one should cheat death twice and I can’t take your place when you are a baby.

There is only one of me, as far as I know. And other than the growing younger part, I don’t know any other repercussions (Death isn’t too chatty).

So, that’s my resume. My fee is high, obviously, and it is not always money. So, if you don’t have money but you want to live, please do give me a call. I might still take your place for appropriate fees. I’m extremely generous to pregnant women (fortunately, you and your kid count as one till the little bugger comes out so Yay! for that).

So, yeah, where was I?

Ah yes! I’m about to die. If I had played my cards right, I would have received a ton of money but I am going to lose it all.

So, a loaded dude told me he was about to die. A 25 year old, rich kid who has no history of any disease! Was I really supposed to believe him? I couldn’t waste my time with him.

Oh shit! I forgot to tell you this part. If I make a pact with someone, I can’t take another case until that person dies. So, the faster a client is supposed to die, the better for me.

Coming back, this idiot kid tells me that he’s about to die and I should take this case. I laugh at his face and reject his case. He told me that if I take his case, he would give me ten times my usual fee. Now, don’t get me wrong, I was tempted. But then I rejected his offer.

Instead, I took the offer of a woman of seventy who wanted to live till she sees a grandson. She didn’t have much money but she did scamper about half of my fees. And boy did she die fast. Heck! She was barely able to sign the document when she had a heart-attack and fell off the window.

Good deal I made, right? WRONG!

The saintly old lady fell straight on a 25-year old guy. Ring any bells? Yes! The guy who thought he was about to die and was offering me 20 times what I got paid.

“Oh dear! False alarm. It was just a flutter,” said the lady and walked away.

It was heart-wrenching to see the old lady stand up and walk away smiling while the goldmine dude lay there dead.

Later, Death told me that the dude had asked some fortune-teller and she had told him about his fate.

“Wow! The fortune-teller was able to predict it right?”

“Nah. Coincidence.” Death said while taking me.

Damn! Black Swans.

Anyways, goodbye. Till we meet again.